Hunger Games: Catching Meals (Extended Breastfeeder's Quest)

I am still nursing my 14 month old son and these past few weeks GRABE, I am getting more hungry than ever. Last year, i am hungry too but this time, i can't get full anymore. The word ''busog' is no longer in my vocabulary. Now i eat a lot, BIG FREQUENT FEEDINGS. I am very petite (5 feet tall, weighing only 36 to 40kg --that's my normal weight scale since teenage years and even until now at age 26 and have two kids) and i wanted to gain weight to be 'normal' in the eyes of the many (yeah, including you perhaps? Hehe). But even with my super big appetite and excessive eating, i just can't achieve my dream weight (but I do some excercises but just for toning my abs and butt for vanity puposes lang, hehe di naman siguro yun sobrang nakakapayat). I know many of you will tell me how lucky i am for not getting fat ever.

But my hunger is not so cool anymore, i literally live in the kitchen now, even my mouth get tired chewing. I spend the entire day eating and get a headache if i can't have a meal for maximum of only 3 hours after the last one. It's a challenge for me as a stay-at-home mom and i have no nannies for my kids so I usually struggle having the chance to prepare and eat lots of food like ALL the freaking time. I am also super thirsty. I am not pregnant, but my appetite is many many times bigger than during my pregnancies.

And coz i eat and drink a lot, I also pee and poop a lot (my normal bowel movement when I was a dalaga is twice a day, I just have an incredibly fast metabolism then ngayon dadagdagan pa ng more toilet sessions). I got worried I might be orally fixated or might have some metabolic or hormonal diseases. But I felt glad nasa popular google search ang 'excessive hunger during breastfeeding' and felt relieved to hear stories from other moms and discovered that i am not alone and I am just as normal as other extended breastfeeders.

I am just so amazed of how my body works just to provide the best snack drink (extended breastfeeding) for my toddler. God is a genius, He designed women's bodies to become nurturers of little earthlings, however difficult (and hungry) it takes. Nakakapagod man ang kumain ng kumain nang hindi nabubusog, and halos hihimatayin na ako sa 'starvation' na feeling (feeling ko lang yun, ang sikip na ng pants ko) if hindi makakain ng meal every now and then, OKAY lang basta para sa anak. At sana naman magka laman na talaga ako nito para maging voloptuous na ang aking stick-figure body! Hehe Let my real-life Hunger Games begin! ;)

The Amazing Nursingmom

I am obsessed with The Amazing Spiderman Movie so it inspired me for the title of this blog post (hehe).

We had another Parent's Meeting at school, for my eldest child Ace, who is in Nursery. And as usual, my EBF baby boy, Coy, was with me. There's no way (no time & energy left) for me to be pumping & storing breastmilk for now. Heck, it's even a struggle for me to find time to have meals. So baby must come with me, I am a nursing mom. And so, another parent (this happened before) who's sitting next to me asked what baby's age is (just to add, lately I'm not receiving questions that asked how many months but rather 'pila na ni ka tuig?' or in english: how many 'years'?). When I answered that my baby is 8 months old, she seemed amazed and added that he is 'buyag' (I can't translate buyag, but it's something like she can't believe he's still an infant). Then I sensed that just like everybody else, she's gonna ask what's his milk (in many instances, what 'brand' of milk), so I took the opportunity to share before these words come out from her mouth...

By the way, all conversations (written in bold) are originally spoken in vernacular (bisaya/visayan). I said, "He's breastfed so I just can't leave him at home. Besides, he loves it here during meetings." And there, the mom had eyes widened and are dashing with amusement and she added (or to re-confirm the BF thingy), "As in purely breastfed? No powdered milk?" then I proudly replied, "Of course, hello? Formula milk is just too expensive." And just like any other stranger I met for this year, I'm feeling glad that they'd get amazed and would usually comment, "Wow, mother's milk, that's great!" or "Wow, so this child is really close to the mother" or "Wow, how big your financial savings are!" and always, always with the tone of surprise. Can't blame them though, anyone who'd discovered that an ultra petite & teenage-looking mom like me could be capable of producing food for my baby & could dare to pop those boobies in public, would be just as amazed.

To continue, she praised the fact that I am breastfeeding my baby and that's a very great thing but she still seemed to be curious about  my breastfeeding experience (by the way she told me she has a 1.5 year old child left at home, who I suppose is not BF anymore), she asked again, "So you still can't sleep through the night coz you're feeding? Isn't it tiring?" Then again, proudly answered (and corrected this very common misconception) "Oh no 'te, he sleeps by my side, all I do is to be on a side-lying position and that's it, no effort!" She nodded, still surprised and so I added, "Because with my eldest whom I weaned at only 5 months old, I experienced the most dead-tired days and nights of my life. Imagine getting up at night, at dawn, at sunrise just to prepare milk, shake the bottles then wash & sterilize them all. With BF, all I do is lie down, I don't even have to really wake-up, I mean anybody can do that (change position) while half-asleep or even on deep sleep so technically, I am sleeping through the night." And I smiled the whole time while explaining.

Ok so I guess, for that day, and for that specific mom, breastfeeding is well-'defended', oh well like I'm at a court trial (hehe). More to go. Hwew! I just can't believe many parents still are amazed, but I don't know if it's a good thing though, sometimes I think that they think it's too inconvenient for a young-looking mom like me and that they think I am rich (I just look like one but I'm so penniless/unemployed), thinking that I can afford formula milk but why settle for this impractical, non-modernized, primitive way of feeding (I think that's what they think). In my mind, they might even wonder why I dare to face the hassle of bringing baby anytime anywhere, why dare to bare (sadly, Filipinos still have this discrimination for BFing & most people associate this to be only for the poor who can't afford formula milk, or for those unattractive not-so-young moms since men wouldn't care to look at her topless expo), why dare to wake-up at night feedings, dare to submit myself as a full-time mom when I can do better and earn money as a career-woman, and many other suffs I personally call 'myths'.

Well I completely understand, we all have different choices, beliefs and priorities. But just in my humble opinion, the fact is, there is something better than all of these (of what they think is better)-- and for me that's the 'best'. And the best choice, best belief, and best priority is what I have right now. Might not always be best for everybody but it is for ME. Afterall this is my baby, my family, my boobs, my life. I'm willing to share to anyone what works best for me (with matching #BREASTisBEST hashtags on my Instagram photos of me, beautifully and blissfully breastfeeding). And yes, just simply be amazed. ;)

My Not-so-Beautiful Hospitalization Adventures

It was April last year 2012 when I was still working... my 2-year-old daughter who is usually hyperactive every second of everyday seemed to be normal (behave na).  SUPER unusual. But when the time came that she's no longer feeding , talking or even smiling, my heart and my mind was blown as I got home from work and staring at my matamlay baby girl. And I know at that very moment I am on "panic mode". Heck! I don't even have an income, just a volunteer nurse for two different services: a Diagnostic Laboratory and a non-profit OB Clinic. Volunteer, yes, not so charitable of me eh? ;) And then, that moment, I know this calls for hospitalization and that means we're gonna spend money-- lots of money (kaysa naman sa mapabayaan kami sa Government hospital. hmm). This is all so intense for me, it's my daughter's first hospitalization (aside from her birth) and first time to get really sick. She was vomiting and also pooping water! As in super watery stools and lethargic. My mom and hubby assisted me during the hospitalization. Upon discharging, my heart was pounding so hard waiting for our bill. But thank God, it was much less that I expected. Thanks to Phil Health! 

January that year (2012) I already contributed for years 2012 and 2013. And my baby Ace is my dependent. It's a big help. Especially that after my daughter's hospitalization, upon arriving home, I felt so sick. I'm having all the symptoms my daughter experienced (vomiting, diarrhea, lethargy, loss of appetite) and obviously shows i caught the virus or bacteria (it was not diagnosed, basta lang kay "Moderate Dehydration due to Gastroenteritis" daw yun. It's too difficult din to "catch" a good specimen for stool exam when there's just no stool, only water! And again, I know for sure I'm gonna get admitted! 

I don't know but these happenings made me think that it's really true that "bad luck strikes not just once but twice, or even thrice" (Big sigh)... I had to be hospitalized, I can't even have the power to sit or to talk! Super drained energy (Plus, it's stressful to be a patient's watcher esp. if the patient is your child). All the contributing factors made me stayed at the hospital for a couple of days. That's the saddest days of my life. For 2 years of no-separation from my first-born Ace, that time, it is happening. I miss her so much. Hubby had to get excused from work to take care of me (mom took care of my daughter). My sister wasn't here at Davao to help me (more sadly, she also had the bug, same symptoms w/ ours, only that, she's at Cebu that time to be our represebattive as our Clan mourns for the death our father's brother. Mas kawawa siya coz siya lang mag-isa doon.)

Haaay.. What an illness! This is epic! During my hospital stay, all I wanted is the intravenous administration of pregnant-safe drugs to control my excessive vomiting and the fetal heart monitoring. YES... That time I (secretly) was 3 months PREGNANT (with my charming baby Coy, my 2nd child) and nobody knows but me and Mel (and my OB-GYN just knew about it too). Hubby and I are conquering one of the real-life storms and are actualizing our "in sickness and in health" marriage vows. And we were unable to tell everyone about our second baby for some personal reasons so it's just among us, the medical team. It was super! All the secrets, the stresses, the illnesses. But again, thanks to PHIC, the bill wasn't that big. Great help for patients like us who are getting crazy with all other financial and emotional stuffs.

After that, I promised myself to stay healthy and also, as much as possible, prepare for emergency situations like these. God cannot ensure us, whether rich or poor, that we're gonna have healthy and emergency-proof lives. So better be prepared. One way is to secure your PHIC matters. The MDR I used for our April hospitalization is still the one I used for the birth of 2nd baby on October 2012. So Here are some quick info about it...

>REQUIREMENTS:

(Submit the following to the billing section prior to hospital discharge:)

*CF1 FORM (Duly accomplished PhilHealth Claim Form 1)

You can get this from the hospital or download it at www.philhealth.gov.ph. Fill your information together with the patient’s information. AND then (if employed) give it to your employer to be filled-up.

*CERTIFICATE OF CONTRIBUTION

(IF EMPLOYED) This is a certificate of your contribution to PhilHealth from your employer. It should state at least 6 months of contribution. Stating your participating amount, date of payment and OR number.

*MDR (Member Data Record) 

Clear copy of MDR. This your record from Philhealth together with your beneficiaries. This is a proof that your are registered at Philhealth. You can get this at any Philhealth center near you, anytime. In my case, I am "individually paying or volunteer" so I just showed my official receipts. If you are expecting, better get one ASAP, you don't want to get this one right after ka ni-raspa.

*PROOF OF RELATION

If the patient is not registered with your Philhealth (shown in your MDR), you need to provide this requirement.

If the patient is your spouse, you need a Marriage Certificate. And if the patient is your child, parent, or sibling, you need their Birth Certificate.

>HELPFUL TIPS:

* Prepare all the documents needed prior to confinement or as early as the day of confinement. It is easier to get the claim when it is included in your bill than reimbursing it after the confinement (but hospitals usually require people to process this within 24 hours upon admission).

* Ask you doctor, if he/she is accepting Philhealth. So that they will be informed that they have to deduct Philhealth from their charge. Again, discounts, we love! ;)

* Be a smart one, research and discover. Know more about your benefits. See PHIC's FAQs section.

http://www.philhealth.gov.ph/members/employed/faqs.html

* Davao City's new PHIC center is now located at Magallanes St. 

Good luck and let's all stay healthy, as much as possible and be prepared for some of these not-so-beautiful instances.

The Future of Spoiled Children

I have no intention to make the first post on this blog as a gossip. haha But oh well, this is for information purposes. There's this guy I know that have impregnated a girl three times already, just within a 3-year period! But before that, this guy had already impregnated three other girls, each of them has one child w/ him. All these, (the six kids) they were all created within a 6-year period, so meaning, that guy had one new child every year. It's crazy. But it's true. I was able to have a conversation w/ the guy and he was really the happy-go-lucky bad-boy type, and has forever been on 3rd (or 2nd) year college. Also had a chat w/ this guy's mother, who was so devastated w/ his son's doings but she got nothing to do but to accept these and accept him-- he's her child, of course. Just let it be. Besides, she really can do nothing because she's not w/ his son. She had worked all her life abroad just to give his 'only child' (and I suppose he's also a 'spoiled child') all the things he needed. ALL THE THINGS.

But I can't believe I am sharing this kind of article, like who am I? I might just be another spoiled brat myself! But this is important. And I'm just sharing this article that I found online (http://expertscolumn.com) coz I am one concerned citizen. As a parent, I believe this might help my fellow parents prevent further production of spoiled children which in time transforms into ROTTEN ADULTS (Oh, so they have a future tense for 'spoiled children' huh!) Let our children also be aware because the effects are DEVASTATING and IRREVERSIBLE both to themselves, their poor parents and to the society.

As a child, I can relate somehow. Well again, speaking of spoiled-ness, I admit that I am one of them. Slight (hehe tatawad pa?) Yes coz I wanna get what I want, especially when I know that my father (when he was still a dollar-earner seaman) gives me whatever I want no matter what I do. But not at ALL times. And it stopped when I myself became a parent already. I am saved, somehow. And at least I'm not to the WORSE type of spoiled child maybe because afterall, despite the fact that I married and got pregnant early, I was able to finish college and have a professional license before that. And I never did and never will take illegal drugs and is never ever sexually promiscuous. And by the way, the guy's 7th child is coming out soon, with a new girl. Wow!

HERE'S THE ARTICLE:

Signs of a Spoiled Child

  

Overindulged and pampered children may grow up spoiled, unhappy and unable to handle life’s challenges. Psychologist Bruce Baldwin calls these youngsters the "cornucopia kids" because they expect life to be like a cornucopia, or horn of plenty — providing them with an endless supply of good things they don’t have to work for."

In this age the number of spoiled children has grown to epidemic proportions, although parents of spoiled children would rather not admit this. Children with cornucopia complexes grow up with the expectation, based on experience, that the good life will always be available for the asking —without effort and without need for personal accountability." Thus when they face the adult world, "cornucopia kids" fail as they are unable to handle challenges, tend and get fired from jobs and are more likely to turn to alcoholics or drug addicts.

Much of the blame, according to Baldwin, must be heaped upon parents. Parents have a tendency to choose to favor or prioritize the development of their career over than the emotional growth of their children. Because of this, with the meager time spent with their children, they "shower" the kids with things and favors to make up for the neglect, hoping to ease their guilt.

Spoiled children are a product of parents who lack discipline. Nothing happens even if the youngsters misbehave. And since a parent, or a hired nanny, does everything for the children, the children never learn to be responsible.

Here are signs of a spoiled child:

1) They get bored easily and have trouble entertaining themselves.

2) They expect to get everything they want when they want it, and complain bitterly if they don’t get the best.

3) They have little sincere compassion or sensitivity to the needs and feelings of others. They respond only to their own needs.

4) They have little self-discipline, so they’re prone to try things like liquor, drugs, promiscuous sex, and other excessive self indulgent behaviors.

5) Deceit and lying are normal. The child learns to lie knowing his parents will want to see through the lie.

6) They don’t expect to pay for the consequences of their actions.

7) If the going gets rough, they quit. They are unable to follow through long-term goals such as saving money or keeping a job.

It is very important that we make our children experience our love as well as how to handle disappointments and responsibility. Parents have a great responsibility in preparing children to become responsible adults.